JAN
· Ushers concert

The year kicked off with Usher’s concert. Following our last concert together being KYLIE. Oishi insisted that we stalk KYLIE after the concert. After spending like 45 minutes in the cold Cherry complained that it was cold and she wanted to go home.

· Heycan VIP night

Last year saw the most successful Turkish dance party which I organised. Both oishi and Josh were there to party with me.Highlights of the night included Lily screaming “Lets get more drinks before the bar closes”. The bar closed at 12am however we were still getting drinks at 1am somehow. Good old management. Oh and who can forget Josh vomiting on Lily’s outfit……… Hmmmmmmm dude!
Well 2003 brought the VIP night which u both missed! Shame on you both!

FEB
· Valentines day with Rachel

Well I have never heard the end of this story. So here it goes. I took a girl out on a first date on valentines day. We had dinner, coffee etc. Nothing really happened. I dropped her home. We didn’t really connect! She sent me a sms saying she had a great time. I repied “No problems”. Hmmmmm ok my bad!

· The car accident

My near death experience in Liverpool. A car went flying off a roof top car park and missed my car by less than a metre. If I was one second late the car would have fallen on top of mine and crushed me to death. However some people always bring the attention back to them. Read flash back email!

“Enverino no way. Who is the bastard that did this. You poor thing. I fell
asleep yesterday cause i was tired but then i tried calling u back at ten
thirty and u didnt answer. im soooo glad ur ok. Ill take u out tonight to
celebrate.
On a different note - heres something that will gross u out. I went to kmart
to get underwear (mine are in the process of getting washed ok - no, i dont
usually get underwear from kmart before you make it another miss shop
episode! theres no grace bros in broadway.). i brought them home and there
was a blood stain on them. YUCK! i freaked. i had to take them back today
and show them. i was embarassed. i had to fill out a customer compaint form
and there were four ladies huddled at the desk telling me what to write
cause they have had to put up with it forever. the manager just called me (a
man) and he was apologising. i dont know which is worse!
that should make u laugh! only i can get myself into these situations.

>From: "Lo, Lily"
>Subject: RE: My near death experience in Liverpool
>Date: Wed, 4 Jun 2003 14:13:12 +1000
>
>omg!!! ~>_<~ god damn asians!!! shoot them all!! (except me). i'm telling u,
>u need to move to burwood!! *HUggLeS* Glad ur ok.
>
>-----Original Message-----
>From: DEnVEr !
>Sent: 4/06/03 11:39
>Subject: My near death experience in Liverpool
>
>Hey guys
>
>I had a near death experience yesterday. Its all a long story. All I
>know was that I was really close to dying and it was freaky. I was
>driving to Liverpool to drop my mum and my brother off. I dropped them
>off on memorial ave. I turned into Northumberland St I think it is.
>There's a huge carpark there with a fruit market next to it. Actually
>its across from centrelink.
>
>Anyway I was driving down and luckly there was no one in front of me. As
>I was driving down I heard a massive explosion behind me. It was
>sooooooo freaky, that I was shaking when I turned back to see what had
>happen. Two asian guys apparently on purpose push a car down from level
>2 of the carpark onto the street. The car smashed down and instantly
>fell on a guy and crushed him to death. I was in so much of a shock I
>didnt know what was happening. Everyone dived out of the shops to see
>and soon the cops and ambo's came.
>
>Just to think that if I was less than a minute slow that car would have
>fell on top of mind.
>
>Anyway I survived and still living so I think we should celebrate on
>the weekend that Im still alive.
>
>Take care
>
>Envy




March
· Ja rule and Ashanti concert

The concert we were supposed to go to but we never did. Apparently the concert sucked!

· The chat room at channel 7

Thanx to my ex employer Austereo I was given tickets to the chat room which was filmed at channel seven studios which apparently featured some of the radio stars. It looked like a great idea however we soon discovered that it was the panel without the panel!

· Tamars 21st –

Who could forget Tamar’s 21st. What a night! First Fred rocked up wearing a lamp shade that was shredded to a million and one pieces, then I found out that my friend met up with her ex boyfriend to celebrate their anniversary. I was like WTF? Throughout the night saw one drink after another. Soon enough Lily was smashed off her face. She had to hold onto the walls as we were walking back to the car and don’t deny it You were sooooooo smashed! hehehe

April
· The wedding / Cherrys bday party

I got screwed over. Oishi cursed me for not showing up to Cherry’s bday bash cuz I had a family friends wedding to go to. Little did I know what was in stall for me. After arriving at the wedding where we were placed on the wrong table the main course was served when an old guy vomited all over the table and food! Grosssss!

· Digital communication began

The incentive course were we met our group members. Well actually we nearly missed them. We had a 10minute break before our lecturer was about to introduce us to our group. So what do we do. Jump into a car and drive crazily to Gloria jeans to get coffee which only bloody burnt my tongue. We got back in time as the lecturer was stressing that the group was incomplete. Oh do I even dare to mention the tray of sandwiches. What the hell were we thinking? Should have taken the coffee!

· Deadman’s creek Idea sprang

It was during the classes in digital communications that my idea for my new movie sprang. I just wish someone shot me then! Little did I know months of headache were about to come out of it. Oh before I forget we had to create a video system which I named “Hooker”. My logo was soon everyone will need their own hooker. The lecturer said he couldn’t talk about our system as a hooker. What would he tell his work mates? That one of his students did a hooker hehehe

· Easter show

Well where do I start. I have 121 pictures of us taking pictures with cows. You see the idea was to design a website for Naz and have her people on their. No comment, I’m shutting up. Oh and the bag were good. Oishi lets get more bags next year pretty please?

· Josh returns – 26/4/03

Late April saw the return of our buddy Josh. Being away for a long time we all hooked up for drinks and yes I was totally smashed. Just for the record I remember everything that went on that night. The toilets at the arthouse, the whore that I didn’t find attractive, you asking me if I was gay cuz I said she wasn’t hot hmmmmmm oh and Fred was wearing another dead animal and got offended at my comment. In btw I have good pics!

· The kidney scene

April also saw the biggest HI scene for the year. The kidney scene. The idea was that cherry escapes from prison or the mental institution and rips Ivy’s kidney out and plays with it However I think we re-wrote that. We filmed that at usyd outside some asian club meeting hehe. Oh who can forget Harry’s pie’s afterwards and Lily getting her jeans caught in my car door. I think Cherry had a minor asthma attack that night!

May
· Digital comm. – Hooker presentations

Digital communications continued in may and this is where we spent hours laughing after one of our group members not to mention any names raji took over 10 hours to do powerpoint slides. LOL. Lily and I left her in the afternoon, went and had dinner, watched a movie, went home and she was still working on the slides. At 6am Lily gets a message saying that she finally finished the slides. What we don’t understand is this we gave her all the material, pictures. All she had to do was insert the bloody things in. How can anyone take 10 to 12 hours?


June
· Charlie’s angels premiere

Oishi you missed the Charlie’s angels premiere. Sexii Cameron diaz, Drew barrymore and Lucy lui walked the red carpet. YUMMY! What sucked about this was that I helped stupid Austereo prepare this event. I should have had VIP tickets!

· Deadmans script 1 written

The script for Deadmans creek was finished. Auditions were rolling, make up artist for set. Oishi signed on as Co-director/cameraman!

July
· Imogen bailey at HMV parra women thru off top level

All I ever wanted was to see Imogen bailey signing autographs at HMV in Parramatta. I rocked up and what happens! Some inconsiderate women throws herself off the top level of westfields and dies!

· Lily’s bellydancing for charity 6/07/03

Oishi’s first performance. We all sat in a row with our cameras and waited. It rocked!

· Premiere of fractured fairytale 19/07 at fox studios

Fractured fairytale was a movie I worked on in January. I promised the part of producer but ended up in the credits as boom boy! The cast were fun to work with but the end product was quite disappointing as the sound quality sucked!

· Interview with access – 21/07

The turning point of my career. Oishi set me up with an interview with access testing centre. I rocked up in jeans and a t-shirt with a messy, unshaven ruffy look. What happen – I got the job! Thanx Dave!

· Freds bday 26/07/03

What part of I have a family thing that night didn’t she understand. Well I missed the party that I organised……… shhhhhh moving along!

· Ricky martin

Three hours in queue. Finally got his autograph and what does he say to me “You have an usual name”. Thanz buddy!

August
· Sexpo
I’ll die if I speak of it. Lets us note it down anyway!

· Deadmans – makeup artist/shot list/shooting schedule

Full steam ahead. Filming was to begin in a week.

· First day at access – 18/08/03

First day on the job. I had no fuckin idea what the hell was going on. I needed a kebab to settle the nerves.

· First deadmans shoot – 23/08/03

OMG! What happen on this day will be a laugh. What ever could go wrong did. The gothic bitch got lost. Had an attitude problem cuz she had no petrol in the car. We got ready. Isabel the makeup artist screamed cuz one of the actors nearly got tomatos on her makeup kit. We had to make her job easier cuz she was pregnant. As filming began the rain started. Cherry was sick for 6 months afterwards! Sorry love!

· The gothic beach that screwed us over
The next day the gothic bitch screwed us over. Slut!

· 24/08/03 – the krispy kreme screw

Double the screw! Someone screwed us over by telling us that KK opened in Liverpool!

· 29/08/03 Zoey cast

We had to recast the gothic bitch with Zoey. Who called and decided to drop out cuz her mother was concerned that she didn’t know us and that she was heading into the bush with us! After convincing her she stayed! Filming went ahead and we had the best shoot when everyone was drunk onset filming the wiji board scene.

September
· Filming

More problems were arising in filming. Mostly due to weather and actors availability becoming less and less. We were stressed so something crazy had to happen hence the phone call!

· The phone call

Due to over dose of coffee from crows nest a phone call was made to cherry to tell her we were arrested and we needed her to bail us out. Sorry cherry!

· Oishis bday bash

After promising me a greek resturant we ended up at an Italian joint. The food was awesome and karaoke was fun. Cherry got drunk on the steak, I left a disturbing message on some guy’s video camera saying for a good time please call Christine! LOL Oh and which two girls had a erotic moment hey???
October

· Refilm – lane cove

Refilming started on deadmans creek and yes we filmed the sex scene part. Nice one!

· Drinks with josh at crows nest hotel

Josh recently returned and shocked the hell out of me. I received an email saying I’m home dude call me! Of course within days he scored a barmen job and we were already there drinking up on a weekday to hang out with him!


· HI update see above email
I have nothing to say but lets film! Email received 23/10/03 from oishi!

Cherry shoots dimitri in the head. Detective saves dimitri and performs surgery on him by removing half of his brain and putting in half of sarahs brain. Whilst he was unconcious, detective removes a kidney from dimitri to pay her spy in thailand to save levi and bring him back from being a pimp. The spy sells the kidney to cherry who dries it, flattens it and turns it into a cowboy hat. Cherry was last seen running down oxford street with the cowboy hat and a lasso made out of cow intestines which slip and falls around her neck. Cherry ends up strangling herself cutting oxygen from her brain putting her into a coma. Meanwhile, dimitri, minus a liver, becomes severly depressed as he can no longer drink alcohol decides to commit suicide by overdosing on Krispy Kreme donuts. He becomes a dual personality
freak where he tries to drown himself in krispy kreme icing syrup and then suddenly decides to wax his legs. Sarah's half of the brain takes over and she reveals who kills her as well as who else shes been sleeping with. Levi, decides to date dimitri/sarah in order to make sarah think that they are a couple so he can find out more secrets. Sarah decides to go on 60minutes to reveal all the secrets. Detective finds out and gets jealous because 60minutes was going to pay her $60000 in kripsy kremes to get her story. As revenge, detective breaks into the krispy kreme kitchen steals 30L of the icing. Detective revives cherry by switching her IV drip with krispy kreme syrup and gangs up together to destroy sarah by driving her insane and playing "i will survive" nonstop for 3 days. Dimitir becomes a half brain dead dumbwitted nong who thinks buffy episodes are not related.

And that, my friends.....is my thought of the day.......


November
· Christians Bday

Yes we all heard on the night that I was hit on by one of Christians guy mates. All I remember was running to Cherry saying I got picked up and she was so xcited and I was like by a guy u nutcase! LOL Lets just forget that incident shall we! Oh and before I forget Lily was picked up by some girl at marracville metro.

· The computer market

I went to buy some CD holders. What do we do, Run crazily under some water fountain and get extremely wet! LOL

· My 23rd party/ Alcohol party

I wouldn’t know where to start. With the vomit, the 2 people having sex in the car, the punch that screwed everyone up, the music, Lily telling everyone that the cops were coming, no wonder cherry and gang ran for it hmm hehehehe
Well lets read some email feedback!

Bday messages

“Thank YOU Enver havent been to a party like that in ages.. had an extremely fun night.. Thanks again...”
“Thanks for having us! I had a great time! Have you recovered yet??”

“Thank you for inviting me dude! it was a great party. The food was great, the music was excellent......and most importantly.................you looked very
drunk and on top of the world! :)'

After Oishi’s death threat message

“I thought this was a virus or something as i didnt recognise the email...btw i nearly fell off my chair after reading this, very well written and funny!! Pumpy it wasn't me!! lol
Enver my man, no disrespect intended but you were quite drunk on the night in question. Are you sure you didn't do the deed yourself?

hehehehehehehe....

I was just wondering if there were any DNA analysis of the regurgitated particles to determine if the suspect was the same individual who was involved in both the KITCHEN and the LAUNDRY scenes. :)))

DETECTIVE

A sample was taken on the night in question. The samples have been sent to the lab for DNA analysis. With the break through technology we have, we will be able to determine who's vomit it is, what they look like as well as what underwear they were wearing on the night. (The wonder's of technology). We have also conducted an analysis on the evidence and it has been found that we have two culprits on our hands. Thats right. We have two sick people on our hands.

Laundry Culprit:
The crime scene revealed that this culprit is extremely disturbed as they chose to vomit in a laundry sink and not the toilet which was "a vomits distance" away. Seriously, if they turned their head to the right they would have gotten everything into the toilet. But since they chose the sink, I would say that the culprit is a sick
loner who likes to vomit on their own. By the way, the suspect had mass amounts of chicken for dinner.

Kitchen Culprit:
The current evidence has shown that this suspect probably arrived to the party late. Not only did they not eat at the party (Lack of chicken in the evidence),they also consumed a large amount of either punch or red wine. (Colour and consistency).

I am urging for any witnesses to come forward. Did you see any of your friends stick their head in the punch bowl? Did you stick your head under the red wine nozzle? Any information that will help us catch the suspect will be greatly appreciated and generously rewarded with trays of sugar loaded pastry. Your identity will remain a secret. Again, the owners of http://www.who-vomited-in-my-sick.com.au would like to thank you for your cooperation.

hahahhahahahah....

FEEDBACK!

thats soooo funnny... but it seems to me that you know way toooo much
information about the events that occurred on the night in question...!!!

who is this by the way?

What do you do at Optus ? which office do you work in?

DECTECTIVE

I am the Detective. I had to analyse the crime scene and interrogate the suspects. I know all. Don't try and hide from me because I WILL FIND OUT THE TRUTH. There is no point in stalking me as my identity is a secret. No one knows my real identity because I do not exist in any systems. I do not exist.

In other news, the photos have come back from lab with what looks like a picture of someone in the toilet. WHAT TYPE OF SICK PERSON TAKES A PICTURE OF SOMEONE IN THE TOILET?! And what type of sick person takes a picture of someone in the toilet but not of someone vomiting in the sink!? Whoever it is, give yourself in. We are currently dusting the camera for fingerprints. With the high crime rate we are seeing, it looks like we have no choice but to interrogate everyone who showed up on the night. EVERYONE IS A SUSPECT AND NO ONE WILL BE SPARED.

Again, there will be a reward of 3kg of tabouli for anyone who can provide information to prosecute the offender.

WAR BREAKS OUT

Guys,

Just like to let you all know that we may have evidence on the real CULPRIT!

I've just run a sniffer trace on "XXX@optusnet.com.au" After analysing
the TCP/IP packets filtered through the directly encoded MIME message. It appears that these segments were traversing through the optusnet.com.au core routers and determining the MAC header bytesize being dropped due to CRC errors on the access switches it appears that the culprit was not TRULY and EFFECTIVELY hiding his identity as he has left all firewall ports open forany form of DOS attacks.

Down goes the detective ;)

DETECTIVE FIGHTS BACK DIRTY!

What makes you think I am using my own computer? How do you know I am not in your building using your computer? How do you know that I have not broken into your house using your computer in your room? (Nice room by the way) I have fotos of you doing unspeakable acts. You should becareful. Infact, i have fotos of everyone from my surveilence cameras. No one can hide from me....

December
· Texas chainsaw massacre

I have never ever watched a disturbing movie like this! It totally freaked me out. Even undead wasn’t this freaky. People were walking out of the movie half way through. Best part was when I scared the hell out of oishi in the carpark in burwood hehehehe

· Cabin fever

Oh godd this movie was gross. 2 horror movies in one week, not a good idea!

· Adverting me at work!

9/12/03
FOR A GOOD TIME RING 9467 50** (Bus Hrs only)
Regards
Lily Lo


· Sophies wedding

Another ex’s wedding. The dare between us – whether we should take the full bottle of Johnny walker and put it into my camera bag. We wasted an extra hour fighting over it hehehe Oh and the dancing incident. I got stuck dancing with 2 old guys! Not to mention Sophie flashing me her tits to tell me she was sunburnt. I think I got hit on again and this time at her wedding for crying out loud!

· My grad party

The ultimate party was Valerie vomiting over fred in the middle of the night! Matt totally pissed drunk lying on the platforms at the train station!

· Lilys bellydance for charity back by popular demand

OMG that was fucking excellent!

· Access Christmas party

I have nothing to say! I want PUSSAY! Oh and Mr attitude brought me a drink. I think he wanted to get me drunk and take advantage. Looks like Mey took advantage!

· HI season finale out with a bang! - Cherrys Glebe point rd Massacre
The first ever injury on HI occurred! Vicki was injured after running into a tree when Cherry was chasing her with a handsaw and a doggie bag with kidneys! Great work guys!Oh mey's leg!

· Oishi’s 45minute top

The latest victim is oishi’s top. After she jetted off to Brisbane I was left doin her dirty work. I had to pick up a top from Just Jeans. After waiting 25minutes in a queue I was told that I had to line up at the changing rooms not the cash registery. At the change room I ended up waiting another 20mins and the girl realised that I wasn’t happy. After 45minutes I was running late to have lunch with shad. While having lunch with shad I thought I better check that this top was fixed properly. So I took it out and shad was looking at it and the next thing I know half of his vege kebab is over it. Hmmmmm

GOODBYE 2003
WELCOME 2004